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Based on the book Feeling Good by David D Burns, we can self-probe our "automatic thinking" which if it uses a dysfunctional thought pattern will lead to problems while if we reprogrammed them with rational thought patterns will recover them. You need to understand the list of "dysfunctional thoughts" and the "rational thoughts" to use this routine, reading the book is recommended, and here is a reference to Cognitive Distortion
The process is done whenever you have "an episode" or something that triggers you, like feeling very upset, feeling very angry, feeling powerless, feeling lifeless, there is an underlying thought pattern that makes you feel so, because others can be in the same situation but don't feel the same. This process helps to uncover and reconstruct your automatic thoughts with better thought patterns and feel much better after it because you have fixed the underlying thoughts of those feelings.
The key idea is to write things down and try to understand your automatic thoughts in the current situation and reconstruct the automatic thoughts, especially the dysfunctional ones with rational ones, for example
- Situation: someone doesn't immediately help me in a certain problem, I get angry and upset
- What I feel: upset 90%, angry 70%
- Automatic thinking: he/she "should" help me, they're obligated to help me, they should have understood my condition and offered me help immediately if they're not helping me, it means they are abandoning me and they push me out and doesn't consider me as their friend. If I have no friends to appreciate me then I feel worthless. If I'm worthless then I will be all alone
- Dysfunctional thoughts that can be identified from above:
- Should: no one owes you anything, they can help you but where does this "should" come from,
- Mind reading: expecting others to can understand/mind read into our condition, without us explaining our condition
- Exaggerating: they're not helping means they are abandoning me
- Fear of being alone
- Rational thinking reconstruction
- Should: They have no obligation to help, it will be great if they help but if they don't it is okay too
- Mind reading: I need to tell them I need help so they know my condition and I hope they can help me, but if they don't i'm still okay and don't held a grudge against them
- Exaggerating: it's not that bad, this problem is not that big, it is unpleasant but nothing major
- Fear of being alone: It is okay to be alone sometimes, it's not that bad, and I am not always alone there are certain events where I can socialize
- What I feel now: upset 20%, angry 5%
- Cope strategy when this happens again: repeat this "There is no should, great if they help and okay even though they don't help, communicate, it's not a big problem, being alone is not bad"
The steps
- Write the current situation: facts only, not what feel or what you thought
- Write what you feel and rate them from 0 to 100%
- Write what thoughts that came into your mind that led to those feelings, and try to trace them, i see this fact and it means this, which also means..., which also means...
- Write down the dysfunctional thoughts: you need to understand the dysfunctional thoughts lists
- Write the rational thought for each dysfunctional thought
- Write down your current feeling and its intensity after writing down the rational thought
- Write down your coping strategy if such a situation happens again, so you can handle the dysfunctional thoughts and reconstruct them into rational thoughts
You can use this in various issues and choose to reconstruct your mind instead of falling victim to your own automatic thoughts.
Fact only, what is the condition that trigger your behavior
What kind of feelings/emotions that you feel and rate them from 0 to 100%, example: anger 85%, anxious 80%, fear 100%
Angry, what is the thought that make you angry, ex: he doesnt respond quickly, he doesnt consider me important enough to give quick response, he disrespected me, I am angry.
Review what you write on the thougths that makr you feel that way, identify which thoughts that is dysfunctional thoughts, underline the thoughts and add the notes of the dysfunctional thougths, you might see the sam same pattern is repeated over and over again
For each of Dysfunctional Thougth, wtite down the rational thoughts
After untangling yourself from dysfunctional thoughts and see the rational thougths, your feeling will be better, example Anger 10%, Anxious 30%. Usually it doesnt directly go to 0%, bit you will feel much better and in control
Create you cope strategy when the same thing happen again. What can you do or you can think to yourself when the same situation happen again? It can be just to repeat this routine, or you do something different like try to communicate better, or realize your dysfunctional thoughts and use the rational thought instead to shape your mood/feeling, or just repeating to yourself “I’m not going to eat the burger” for 20 times
Review & Discussion
